you are in these bones, but they are not you.
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Briefly.
Still, it tears through me like lightning, mouth stretched and twisted, torn and held open by a hurt too big, too old, to kill. I am again, again, again, that animal keening on the floor, forehead to the dirt, reminded as I’ll always be of what my faults and failures kept from me. Read more
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The Work, continued.
Over the past three years I’ve accepted that there are things I (literally) cannot prioritize. The overwhelming, never ending avalanche of domestic maintenance can, and does, shut me down- sometimes for weeks or months on end. And then would come the shame, the self-loathing rooted in the idea that I’m “supposed” to be able to… Read more
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ep.37; godless prayers
Years ago during one of the bigger storms, he was out working on the rooftop of a hospital bc one of their generators went down and their man couldn’t figure it out. I realized I’d believe in god if it meant he’d come home to me. Any god, didn’t matter, just bring him back to… Read more
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Chaos is always neutral.
In the category of things I can’t say, it’s a crushed whisper between thumbs and lace- Novella of symbols spread silk thin across the shoulders of a god too big to love. She’s a liar but it sounds right. Sounds noble, aware, composed. Sounds like reflection because you can’t see through the mirror she spits… Read more
let me sow that i may reap 